New Beginnings in Merica

Well folks, it's been about 2 weeks since I've been back in America. I'm trying to figure out how exactly to do life here. What I now have on my hands is a whole lot of time. Time. I'm in some weird in-between stage at the moment. Part of what I've been trying to figure out is how to spend this time. So, I'm doing it the best way I know how.

What have I been up to? 

My brother's band concert. 

My brother's football game. 

Kindergarten field trips with my mom's class. 

Watching the Nightmare Before Christmas with my brothers. 

Visiting my best friend in the upstate of SC. 

Dancing the night away. 

Playing tennis with my dad and brothers. 

Visiting my grandparents in a pea sized town for a bit. 

Carving pumpkins.

I'm trying to make the most of this extra time. So far? It's been fun to get a taste of the things I've been missing out on. One day at a time, I feel like I will eventually get used to being here again. What's going to happen tomorrow or the next day is something I'm trying to let go of, give to God, and not worry about too much. It's just time to soak up the precious time that I have with people in my life. I'll find my place and figure things out eventually. For now, I'm just being for a while.

I miss my home away from home. Southeast Asia is on my heart and mind every day that I breathe. 

Here's to transitions and change. 

When Wal*Mart causes depression

I'm back in America. It's officially been one week. I've noticed a whole lot of things that I never used to notice before. I know that I am an American. But let's put it this way… Imagine for a second that all Americans are squares. And all the people where I was serving are circles. Then you have me. I was a square, but when I moved away, I started to lose (painfully lose) my corners and edges a little bit. Now? I'm some strange octagon. Not really a square, not really a circle. It feels pretty weird.

Holli is an…. 

So, Wal*Mart is a bit overwhelming. I go inside and cannot buy more than a handful of things.  Hearing super fast English all the time is overwhelming. What did you say? Come again? 

Everyone is moving so fast! Why are you guys so busy? Let's go plant rice and take a nap at our fruit stand. Church is really nice and formal. I can understand everything that everyone says (and sometimes I'd rather be in the dark for some conversations). There are no pot-holes in the roads. The dirt here is dark brown instead of reddish orange. American food is now bland to me. Yeah, I do feel like an alien. Things aren't better or worse here. Things are just different. I can take a shower for days. The water would still be hot. The water would still be ON! It's kinda nuts. 

I've enjoyed seeing friends and family so far. I still get a little blinded in my mind over how to answer: "How was it?" Oh! And I don't know how to respond to: "I bet you're glad to be back." It was a whole lot of things cuz it was 2 years. Was it good? Yes. Challenging? Yes. Did I grow? Yes. Would I do it again? Yes. Hard times? Yes. Difficult? Yes. An entire rainbow full of answers for that question. And yes, I am glad to see people. I'm not necessarily glad to be back. I miss the land that became my home. I miss the people who became my second family.Maybe I could take all the people I love in America back to Asia with me. That's a nice compromise. Who's in? 

To all my peeps here in the USA, sorry if I'm weird, socially awkward, or can't seem to find the right words to say at the moment. Bare with me. I'm sure things will get better with time. 

-Octagon Life

OMG! Why'd you cut your hair?

Guilty: I cut my hair really short. 

It's true. You might have seen pictures of it on Facebook already. I personally love it. Many people have asked me why I cut my beautiful locks off. As always, I have answers for you. No worries. 

Drum roll, please! I cut my hair before I came home because I feel so so different inside. Usually, people look at the outside only and assume it reflects the inside. Cutting to the point here, I didn't want to look the same as I did before I left because I didn't want people to assume that I was/am the same now. I want the outside to be a direct reflection of the inside: Changed, Different. I feel like a completely different person after living overseas. Maybe I have the same personality, but I have grown and changed so much over the past 2 years of my life. 

I was really nervous about cutting my hair this short. I think it's super cute, kinda sexy, and really fun to play with and spike up every day. For me, cutting it off was symbolic of what's going on inside of me. One huge chapter of my life has come to a close; the next one is new, mysterious, and uncharted territory that I've yet to see. Land that I've yet to walk on. New oceans that I've yet to taste. When I cut my hair off, I symbolically felt the old parts of me being cut away and falling onto the floor. When I took a shower to wash all the hair off of my body, I felt like those past parts of me were being washed away. And even when I cleaned gobs of my hair out of the shower drain, I felt as if I were throwing the old me into the trash can. 

I looked into the mirror afterwards and finally saw a reflection of myself that accurately portrayed how I felt inside. And since people look so much at the outside and make so many judgments from it, now they will be able to accurately assume that I have changed. They will know on the surface by looking at me that my hair is different. Maybe then they will begin to make the connection that the inside of me is what has really changed. 

By the way? I love my short hair a whole lot. 

One To Go

I have less than a month left here in Southeast Asia. Time hasn't necessarily flown by, but here it is coming to a rapid ending nonetheless. I cannot help but reflect on the past 2 years of my life at this point in the game when it's so close to departure time.

Here's the bottom line: I've fallen in love with this country and the people in it.

All of my students, soccer girls, like-minded friends, market ladies, and people who used to be unfamiliar strangers. They have all become fierce friends and family to me here. My heart will be split into a million pieces in just a few weeks when I have to go back to America. If I'm honest with you all, I'll tell you something. I have no idea how to function in America anymore. Whenever I think about it, I just can't wrap my mind around it. It may seem completely retarded to you that I'm anything besides ecstatic about coming home, but to me? It's not surprising at all that coming home is laced with 1,000 different emotions and concerns.

Yes, I'm going to swim in a sea of Taco Bell quesadillas and drown myself in a waterfall of Code Red Mountain Dew. Yes, I'm also going to feel like an alien in my own culture and country. I could make a list more than a mile long of comparisons, pros, cons, fears, happy things… All I have left to do is trust and cling to the one who never leaves me.

So in this post, I'm going to try not to worry. I'm going to try to trust with reckless abandon instead. Someone holds my hands and heart. I may feel strange and alone, but I am not. I may not know the future whatsoever, but he does. I may feel completely unraveled and undone, but he will hold me together. If anything, being here has helped me to learn about trusting him with everything, even the smallest of things. Because he sees the depths of my soul, and he knows exactly what's coming next. Ask me about my plans, and I will tell you that I have a trillion ideas- no plans. I'm planning on waiting until I hear clearly what on this earth he wants me to do with the rest of my life (better yet what he wants me to do in this next stretch of the journey since he seems to like to reveal bits and pieces at a time.) People may not like that answer, but it's OK with me. When things are well with your soul, the rest seems to fall in line in its own timing. Thankfully, I have peace and hope to cling to.

Life has no pause button, no rewind, no fast forward. You cannot speed it up or slow it down. But by all means, you must live it. I have breath in my lungs for another day, so I know that I'm meant to live this life whatever may come. And, I am not, nor will I ever be alone. Today, my heart is holding on to that fact and trying to know it, believe it, and feel it deeply although I am afraid.

3, 2, 1….

Countdown

I'm up late tonight. Today is August 10th technically. That means that in exactly 2 months, I will be on my first plane ride home. For my friends and family back home, this is exciting for you and I. For my friends and those who have become family here, this is a bit of a heart-breaker as well. It's going to be… tough, scary, and a world of unknown.

Home

There are things that I miss and will love coming home to. I miss people more than anything. I have missed a lot of my brothers' ball games, concerts, and plays. I also missed watching them literally grow. They are now taller than me, faster, and probably stronger (but I will still put up a good fight.) I missed being there for sickness scares in my immediate family. I missed holding a hand while rounds of radiation were being completed and surgeries were done. I missed out old refrigerator finally biting the dust and being replaced by something awfully modern. So, one thing I will enjoy is being around- just existing on the same continent as most of the people who are close to my heart. 

Here

I am leaving Laos, which has been my home for going on 2 years. I will leave behind tons of relationships made with students. I will leave behind my soccer girls, who I've come to love so dearly. I will leave the language and culture that I've been busting my tail to learn and try to understand. I will leave a beautiful, mountainous, terraced rice field land. I will leave those who have taken me in on numerous holidays when I've felt like running away from the world. I will leave friends who I do not know if I will ever see again in this life. 

Fears and Feelings

I will be overwhelmed with joy when I hug my family for the first time in 2 years. I will tackle them all down in the airport and probably drown them in happy tears. I will love and hate Walmart and all its glorious food choices that will leave my jaw dropped. I will be scared of the unknown in this next phase of life. Where I will go to grad school, where to live, what kind of job to get, what career to pursue… I have a feeling that I will feel lost for a while right when I was starting to become familiar with life here in Laos. I am worried that I will choose wrongly. I am worried that I won't meet people's expectations, dreams, and goals for my life. I may let them down. 

But I am not alone… And I do have a purpose in this life. And God is with me. And he is faithful. He will not leave me, not ever. This is what I hold onto as a tidal wave tsunami of change lurks above my lead in suspense. When the wave crashes, somehow I know I will live to see it through. 

Thus marks the beginning of my 3, 2, 1, hold your breath count down. 

Getting Knocked Off My High Horse Of Entitlement

MY WATER CHALLENGE

Our water has been off and on, but mostly off, for a few months now. Before rainy season hit, everything was extremely dry and dusty. Our water came on for a few hours LATE every night. We'd stay up to fill up all of our buckets and pots with water to use for the next day. Right now, the water is still off and on. Luckily, it's strong enough to travel up the pipes into our house though. What has been such a change is getting used to heating up water on the stove before bathing. We heat up a couple of pots to knock the chill off of the water in out bucket. Then, we take a dip bath with a ladle. This entire process bugged the mess out of me at first, but it has become just another part of life here now.

A new experience during dry season: I was feeling extremely dirty seeing as how my showers have been… well… few and far between. So, I had to dip water out of a big bucket outside in the moonlight with the frogs living inside and bugs flying around in order to bathe myself and attempt to wash my hair. This is the first time in my entire life that I have ever bathed outside under the stars -- not because I was camping and chose to do so-- but because I HAD to in order to stay clean.

In this country, I have traveled around and seen many people in villages bathing at the local water spigot beside the road. I have thought of them before and wondered about their lives, but last night I got a little taste of a different world, a different life. To many of my friends, bathing like this is normal. They don't have water heaters and showers inside for the most part. Bathing outside and taking dip baths have been truly humbling experiences for me.

"LET THEM EAT CAKE"

I went to a birthday party for one of my soccer girls the other day. We met in her wooden house lined with old calendars and posters (insulation). I always feel a bit awkward at parties, but I go anyways just to be there for the person who's having a birthday. On a small, round, traditional wicker table, there were some snacks and a cake that was 6 inches in diameter. A few trinkets sat around the cake, and those were her birthday presents. There were about 25 people at her house, and I wondered to myself… "How on earth are all these people going to split that tiny cake??" 

Time passed by, and it was time to cut into the tiny cake into most treasured pieces. I was asked to do the cutting. I asked my friend, "How many pieces should I cut? There are a lot of people here." She simply replied, "Six." I was wary of her answer because I was thinking… "OK, 6 people will get cake, and everyone else will go home cake-less." I cut the pieces anyways and waited to see what would happen next. What I saw amazed me and totally took me off guard. 

Each person who was handed a cake plate shared it with a group of about 5 people. It wasn't even a question to them. It was an expected thing! They all knew what was about to happen… They all knew that they would pinch off pieces of cake and treasure each small morsel along with the people in their community and family. 

SPOILED

I am sitting at my house right now with a strange feeling inside. Part of me wants to cry. Part of me feels rich and stingy. Part of me wants to open the doors of my house and let anyone who wants to come inside enter and share all that I have with them. I want to open my cabinets and spread the love to the world. I feel spoiled. I feel like I unknowingly flaunt my well-offness to others here. Now, I am aware of how well-off I am and always have been. Being in a house where my friends have close to nothing, yet seeing them still share everything eats at my core. It gnaws on my every thought and emotion and really bothers me inside. WHY? 

Because I am spoiled. I always have been. I have always had hot water in my house, clean water to drink, electricity, clothes, and food in overabundance. That is a security that is being challenged by life here. Here, I go without for one day, and I feel like I have been wronged in some way. I naturally expect to have certain things in my world. Throughout my time here, I am also getting knocked off my high horse of spoiled entitlement, and that is a good thing. One of the results of living here is that I feel more thankful and blessed. I also feel like sharing more of the things that I have been blessed with, not only when I have an obvious excess, but when I have barely nothing as well. "God, help me to give… Help me not to hoard gifts from you or others… Please keep my spoiled, entitled heart in check." 

Certainly Uncertain

Of one thing I am certain: Uncertainty 

Being here in Southeast Asia where life is slow and laid-back, where my normal background noise has come to be goats and chickens outside of my window, I have had a lot of time to think. I write more and take the time to ponder a lot of things that I had never had the time to think about before coming here. During my thinking time, something has majorly surprised me. Within the folds of my logic, facts, and reasoning, I have discovered a lot of layers, links, emotions, triggers, and feelings that other people may never understand. And even though others may never fully "get" me, these things are still a big, true part of me. They may not define who I am wholly, but they certainly help make up who Holli is. 

I came to Asia to share and serve others. I knew what my purpose was, and I still know what my purpose remains to be. I knew that my time here would change me and effect the way that I see forever. However, I didn't expect that the impact would be so deep and life-altering. 

My time here is not over yet. I still have 3 months and some change of my term, but if you asked me what words I would use to describe the experience so far, I'd say: 

Healing, Feeling, Growth, Metamorphosis, Peace, Self-Exploration, Discovery, and Ownership

It's easy to trek through life and walk around as if you have everything figured out. It's easy to have boxes that you can put everything and everyone inside of. Having a two-sided coin and slapping people, situations, thoughts, or emotions on either side of the coin is so simple. What's really tough is delving into these 4 things for the multi-faceted, layered, complex, unique things that they are. It's also easier to jump head first into the deep of someone else's person. Tackling self is a whole lot harder. I feel like a recurring theme for my time here has been self-tackling; coming to terms with me. If you know me, you know that I do believe in God. I like to say that, "God always has something up his sleeve, and God has big sleeves." Part of the reason that God led me here to this place has become clear to me: I am here to grow. 

I should be certainly uncertain about where I am and about where I think others are in life, because where we are is ever-changing, ever-growing, ever-molding. In other words, I'd rather peruse life as a learner, thinker, and listener than one who blindly speaks, boxes, and knows things. To always be the student rather than the professor. After all, I as a person do not possess the credentials or rights to be the professor of my life and everyone else's. 

Summary? I don't have it all figured out. 

Additional conclusion? And that is OK :)  

Now, for some less serious stuff! 

Me in the local style dress. We did a photo shoot, make-up, hair, and this is totally out of my character. 

BUT! It was fun, and I wanted everyone to see the local digs. 

My roommate and I. Our house is always an adventure with 4 different languages being spoken in order to communicate! Learning to give and receive patience. 

My soccer girls and I watching some soccer ed. videos. 

Highlights of last year's women's world cup. 

Me getting a haircut in the capital. Everyone say hello to Apple, the chick with the awesome haircut chopping my locks off. I seriously need to broaden my hair horizons. She's rockin that pink! 

And, counting my blessings here to have good friends all over the world. 

Thank you God for reminding me that I am not alone. 

~Tok Jai

Can I have a crystal ball please? Sometimes, that sounds appealing. At other times, I just want to be shocked, amazed, and surprised by life. 

Example: One of the things I was NOT expecting was this soccer team. It came out of the blue as a surprise. But, the father knew that these girls were going to be a part of my world. Doesn't God have cool things up his sleeve?  

Example 2: Check this place out, dude! It was in the middle of fricken nowhere. We may have gotten turned around a few times before we got there. Yet, super relaxing and so so beautiful! 

No thanks, I don't want to know the future. Keep on giving me surprises one day at a time. Whether they are beautiful, hard, amazing, jaw-dropping, devastating, lovely, peaceful, sorrowful, tear-jerkers, challenging, or just plain crazy…. I don't want to know what's coming next. I'll just take it as it comes. Whatever life throws my way, it is well with my soul. Even so, it is well. 

Doors

Hello world,

I recently had a pretty humbling run-in with doors in my life; one that made me reflect upon my life up until this point. Here's what happened:

A soccer company offered three spots to my girl's soccer team to go to receive soccer training and go to Brazil for the World Cup finals. I was so pumped for my girls! They've been working hard for the past year+ and really deserve the chance. Three got selected, and I was told they would need a female chaperone. Who better than their coach? A series of events followed that are pretty contradictory to each other.

First, they told me I needed to go. Then, they said I couldn't. A week later, they said I could go again. So, I sent them my passport info and started to get my hopes up. I asked what the dates were for the Brazil trip so that I could be prepared to go. Alas, the dates were the same exact days as my mandatory meeting. I then had to ask my boss if I could skip the meeting and go. He said yes!!! However, the next day was depressing because I didn't get chosen. Someone else did.

DOORS!!!!! 

"What the heck?" - the only thing that popped into my mind after that dream-crusher 

This unfortunate experience that kept pulling my emotions left and right made me think about doors, life, chances, and opportunities. How do they all relate? Do they even make sense? Half of the time, I don't understand doors. And, where does God fit into all of this? 

My conclusion: Life is full of doors. We walk down one big hall and are faced with door after door varying in shape, size, and color until we reach the end of the hall at some unknown time and fall asleep. Oh, the choices! Oh, the options! It's really quite exciting. We see doors, but do we open them? Sometimes, we see them and walk right by unfazed. Other times we rush in without thinking twice as to what my really be lying behind the slab of wood. Simply walking through the hall and never opening any door would be a shame. I'd imagine that your life would be filled with a swirling cloud of what-ifs. At the end, you'd wish you could start over and take some chances. 

In the past, I used to walk down the hall and see doors but be too afraid to open them. Now? I at least want to give them a shot. With discernment, mind you, but also with excitement and a spirit of adventure. What if I had not even tried to go with my girls? I would've kicked myself in the butt for a while, that's for sure. Obviously, it was not a part of the plan- of God's plan for my life. And, you know what? I'm OK with that. Maybe it was one of those moments where it was MY plan that I was trying to bring about, NOT his. I can sit here and rest inside of my mind knowing that my God is in control of my every step. That is a good feeling. Whatever may come my way, even so, it is well with my soul.

Life in the Fast Lane

I just realized that today is the last day of February. Sometime in October of this year, I'll be getting on a plane and heading back to America to start yet another chapter in my life. This leaves me with about 7 months left in Southeast Asia.

I'm bombarded with a slew of mixed thoughts and emotions. Parts of me are thinking of what on earth I'm going to do next. What grad school am I going to go to? Where am I going to live? Should I move somewhere? Where? When? And then… Oh my gosh! I only have 7 more months here. How can I make the most of them? Should I be doing more? Should I change what I'm doing now so that I can do more?? I don't want to say goodbye to things or people here just yet, and I don't know that I will ever fully be ready to say goodbye… or if it will ever truly be goodbye in my heart of hearts.

This place is slowly becoming home. I've the overwhelming sense that this is where I am supposed to be ever since I exited the plane last year. Now? Things are so familiar. The differences are more of just a familiar weirdness now, a weirdness that I kind of like and have become accustomed to at this point.

My life is in the fast lane. Yet, all of our lives are in the fast lane because time does not slow down for anything or anyone. You blink, and 2 years have disappeared. Cheers to speeding through this thing called life with your cruise control on.

God tells me something: that I should not live in the future, but I should live in the now. I have a bad habit of over-dreaming instead of just living. My head lives in the future. God tells me to just soak up what I've got right now. I have an feeling that he wants me to be poured out here because this is where he wants me right now. He has led me here, and he has a plan for my time here that's not quite finished yet no matter how close the day of departure comes.

So, this is my mind dump for the day. If you've been wondering what I'm thinking about, then this crests the surface of my brain.

Will Power! Kinda different from Will-I-Am

WILLS

I've been thinking a whole lot about wills lately. There are a lot of wills out there, ya know?

• God's will
• My will
• My parent's wills
• My family's will
• The will of people back home
• The will of my church
• Everyone has an agenda of some sort. Let's be real.     

That means that there are 6.5 billion different wills out there. WHEW! That's a lot of people who want a lot of different things. It's also a whole lot of different opinions. Can we say.... room for conflict?? You betcha.

I'm going to put out a disclaimer again: I'm only 23, and I'm learning a lot right now. Bear with me, please, and don't let my humble opinions be taken as ultimate truths (I don't know everything).

I read an article the other day on the topic of drinking alcohol. It offered an opinion that was pretty interesting to me, simply because I've never heard it put that way before. The article approached the subject based from a "Can I?" versus "Should I?" standpoint. Basically, the issue is not a matter of "Do I have a right to do this?" Instead, the issue is "Should I do this?" For example: Does this benefit me and people around me? Does this bring me and others closer to God? It was just interesting. I was less captivated on the opinion of the writer and more captivated by his style of argument.

Most of the time, I hear one crowd trying to condemn something vehemently and another crowd trying to gain the right to do something without being condemned. Each side spurns the other. People can use the same source to back up completely opposite viewpoints. Agendas? Wills? Ringing a bell???

I guess it all depends on your motivation, really.
Are you trying to create black and white?
Are you trying to get people to pick sides?
Are you trying to impose guilt on people?
Are you trying to stick to something you believe?

I can't help but think about wills in all of this. By the way, this post is just me thinking out loud so to speak. I'm just thinking. At the end of the day, there are going to be 6.5 billion different opinions. But.... What's God's will? I think God wants to draw people toward him. I think he wants to bridge the gap between the sin that separates us from him. I think he wants everyone to rely on him for hope and grace. I think he loves everyone, but everyone doesn't love him back. I think that he wants peace and unity with humanity.God's will sounds a lot like LOVE.

All I have to say is that I want to love people.

I used to get all puffed up when someone challenged my world view. I'd fight tooth and nail, argue, and come off as quite the prick half of the time. But now, I live in Southeast Asia. Friends, Asia life is molding me. I don't live in a bubble anymore where there are loads of people who have the same beliefs as I do. There is no teaming up with only people who have the same beliefs anymore. Now, my friend group is wider than life. I have all kinds of friends. They believe all kinds of things. We may talk about those things sometimes if they come up in conversation, but I no longer feel like I'm pushing an agenda of viewpoints on anyone. I now feel like I'm a little bit closer to pushing an agenda of loving on purpose. The response is about 1,000 times better when I tell them why I'm loving them. I love them because God loves them. The end. Simply beautiful. If God's will is to love, then I want my will to be the same thing.

Can I do anything I want to do? Sure, I can. Nobody's got strings attached to my legs and arms like a puppet. I'm free to choose action from action.

Should I do certain things? Maybe so, maybe not. It's worth a thought or two.

Food for thought:

Maybe it all depends on your will/agenda in the end.

I guess the question is: What IS your will? 

And: Should your will be changed?

It's 2014 already?

HMONG NEW YEAR

 

Because of my location, I get the privilege of celebrating the New Year about 5 times per year. Last year, I missed Hmong New Year. But, this year, I got to see it! And let me tell you, I had no idea we had so many Hmong people living in this town.

Everyone gets dressed in their traditional Hmong suits. Hats, stilettos and socks, coins jingling like crazy hanging from brightly colored skirts and blouses. So very exciting!

They have a huge get together that centers around bull fighting and ball throwing. Ball throwing? Yes, ball throwing. It's the only time I've seen tennis balls for sale in this town, and it's actually not a bad idea. Girls and guys get in two extremely long lines that face each other. If a guy is interested in you, he can come up and ask to throw the ball with you. So, you throw balls to each other. It's kinda like a dating service I guess, but hey, people have to get together somehow right?? After all, you have to create enough workers to help run your farm.

Some of the guys start singing to the girls they're trying to woo. If the girl likes him back, she sings back to him. Fascinating to watch, really. They sing an original heart song of their own. They create the tune and the lyrics on the spot. It's like the penguins in Happy Feet. If you've ever seen Happy Feet, you'll know what I'm talking about. If not, go watch it!

The bull fights are exciting, but dangerous. People make a large circle around the bulls. There are no fences or anything. The first bull to run away loses the fight. Trust me, when those bulls go running, you DO NOT want to be standing in the way. The ring of people standing around the bulls scatters frantically when that happens. Needless to say, this is the busiest day of the year for our rinky dink hospital.

Thoroughly enjoyable day for me!

MY ACTUAL NEW YEAR

Adventures...

 

So, I went to a more touristy town for my actual January first New Year. I just wanted to blend into a sea of white faces and not stand out so much. Mission accomplished. I haven't seen that many white people in one place in over a year!

My friend and I decided we wanted to go on some adventures. I wanted to ride an elephant because that's something you have to do at least once in your lifetime. Tagged onto an kayaking trip, and you've got yourself a good day. Or so you think... Ha! You have to remember that I don't live in America. Things like standards, rules, and safety seem to be missing here.

We met our tour guide and the Swiss couple who also signed up for the trip early in the morning. The first thing that our guide tells us is that it's his first day on the job. NICE. We saw a waterfall and rode elephants first, which was awesome!!!!

 Me on the elephant's head!!!!! SCARY!!!! But awesome.

 This cutie stole my heart <3

Then, we hopped into our kayaks. After about 20 minutes, I noticed that our kayak was retaining water. It was getting pretty difficult to paddle, too. So, we pulled over on the river bank. Our tour guide from Tiger Trail says, "OH, Tiger Trail!!!!" He shakes his head and lifts up our kayak, which pees out God only knows how many gallons of water for about 5 minutes. My friend and I looked at each other just wondering how long this trip was going to be and what else was going to go wrong throughout the course of the day. Tour man informs us that the rest of of trip will be another 3.5 hour down the river to the stopping point. OH BOY!!!!!

We stopped every 30 minutes so our kayak could relieve itself...

About 2 hours into this trip, our guide puts his helmet on. We all notice immediately and ask him why on earth he just did that. Hey said one word: Rapids. What in the ham sandwich? Rapids? We're all inexperienced kayakers here,  so we ask him what level they are. "Oh, Class 2 or 3, I think." GREAT, Tiger Trail. Great. A few moments later, our guide's head disappears down what seems to be a 10 foot drop in the river... He pops out unharmed a ways down. Oh, crap my pants... What on earth did we sign up for? The Swiss go first, and bite it. Jaws gaped open, my friend and I have no choice but to go for it. And.... we went down hard. Haha!!!!! The Swiss man lost a shoe, but we all suffered a blow to our pride.

Best idea of the day: Putting a piece of chewed gum in the dime sized hole in our kayak.
Thanks, Swiss guy.
Thanks, Tiger Trail...