What do you have to lose?

Thought Blurbs as of Late

What do you have to lose? I've been asking myself that question a lot lately. 

Sometimes, people can place paralyzing fear inside of your mind. 

Maybe they meant to.

Maybe it was a mistake.

Maybe they didn't know any better.

Regardless, it's there.

One bad reaction can make you isolate yourself so that you'll never have to react again. 

But this is no way to live. 

I don't want to be scared of losing people. 

I don't want to be afraid of being hurt by words, looks, or slights. 

The truth is that the first cut I endured was the deepest and the worst. 

It came from the worst person it could have ever come from. 

Better yet, no one could cut me at the same level. 

No one could ever even get close. 

The worst has passed. 

So, self... What do you have to lose? 

I suppose there are only things to gain from here on out. 

Maybe this is a good place to be in. 

Not on an island. 

Not in an egg crate that's half-filled with those who can be trusted 100% of the time. 

Free to live.

Free to love.

Free to be me. 

Open to new people. 

Open to old. 

Just open. 

I was made to think I was sitting at my table alone and that I deserved that. 

I asked for it. 

I should expect it. 

But there are chairs available.

The table has an endless amount of black spaces waiting to be filled. 

That's how it should be. 

I went from being an inter-connected continent to being a tiny patch of land surrounded by water. 

It is time to make bridges. 

It is way past time. 

Help me to not be scared. 

Help me to feel it is safe to branch out like I used to feel safe doing. 

Help my spirit to be unbreakable.

Help me to not live as if I have chains around my neck weighing me down.

These are mental chains. 

Chains that have been placed by another to hold me back, restrict my soul. 

There is nothing to lose. 

Only to gain.