Physical Touch: SEA Style

The Way They Roll... 

Sometimes, my friends don't make any sense. Ya know what? I'm sure the feeling is mutual. I probably do some retarded things that make them think... where did this white alien come from? 

Here, it isn't appropriate to hug people. And not just the opposite sex, but friends as well! This is torture to me. I really like hugs. And a hug is my way of sealing the friendship. While hugs are a "No No," holding hands and linking arms is totally ok. As well as placing your hand on a person's thigh. Ha ha ha. 

Example 1:

I went to a party a few weeks ago. It was the strangest party I've ever been to. They had a tent set up. Under the tent, there were about 4 beds. Yes, BEDS. Each bed was for a dead ancestor. Maybe a grandfather or great grandmother. Their pictures hung from the bed frame. Money hung from the posts on the bed. Many pillows were on the beds as well as snacks, flowers, blankets, and clothes. All of these offerings are necessary for the afterlife in their eyes. When you arrive at the party, you give some money to these sweet old ladies that line the floor in front of the beds. They, in return, say a blessing over you and give you pepsi and crackers. Bizzare, I know.

Anyways!!!!! Next, you go sit at a table and eat a meal. The most nerve racking thing at these events is the staring. People are watching your every move, and you know it. No discretion here. So, different locals come cycling through. The bold ones at least. They take turns sitting with the foreigners and talking about how different we are,  skin, weight, marriage status, etc.

This one middle-aged lady came and sat by me for a long long time. She was a chatter-box. That's for sure. After one or two sentences, she grabbed my leg. It wasn't a vice grip or anything, but it certainly un-nerved me a little bit. And it wasn't a temporary touch. The hand lingered. For at least 30 minutes.

Example 2:

My friends like to link arms with me. This is OK. Kind of strange, but manageable. But the hand holding? I'm having to warm up to this. I told them, in my culture, if people see you holding hands with someone other than an old person or small child, they think you love love love that person. Kiss them and everything. They just said.... Ooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhh! But, then they said to me, it's not like that here. When they hold hands with their friends, it means nothing but that they care for their friend. In some ways, it's more innocent here. In the USA, we're robbed this innocent display of affection because of what society thinks. 

Think about it in this light: As children, we hold hands with other children. We hold hands with adults. We may even hold hands with strangers. And then, something happens when we start to get older. We're told to not hold hands anymore. All of a sudden, it means that you want to sleep with that person. But really? Really, you probably just want to show your friend that you care about them. Keep those child-like intentions. It's just a thought. Something to consider. Something I'm having to consider because I live HERE now, and that's how they roll here. Different, yes. Wrong? I really don't think so.